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                              Change Me O Lord

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By David Wilkerson
December 6, 1999
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          Lately I have grown very discouraged over what we
          Christians call counseling. Right now there are more
          trained Christian counselors than in all of church
          history. And there are multitudes of "how to" books and
          relationship manuals available, offering spiritual
          advice on every subject, from marriage to physical
          fitness to child-rearing.

          Yet, tragically, there are more troubled individuals,
          marriages and families in the church than ever before.
          The turmoil in Christian homes today is unspeakable --
          and, beloved, this ought not to be so.

          Let me say up front, I am not against Christian
          counseling. Many people are responding to the
          counseling they're getting, and it's healing their
          lives, marriages and homes. Indeed, counseling has
          become a major ministry in the church of Jesus Christ.
          Almost every large congregation in America has at least
          one full-time counselor on staff. Here at Times Square
          Church, we use a number of counselors.

          But I see more and more troubled Christians who don't
          respond at all to the counseling they receive. They may
          be ministered to for weeks, even months, with no
          results. A pastor or counselor can take them step by
          step through the scriptures, showing them the clear
          truth of God's word. He can tell them, "Here is what
          God says about your problem. He says you're supposed to
          do this..." He confronts them with the reality that if
          they don't forsake their sin, they will incur God's
          judgment.

          Yet none of this counsel registers. Why? There is a
          spiritual veil over these people's eyes. They have a
          terrible blindness to their own guilt and need to
          change.

          Many Christian families are at each other's throats,
          fighting bitterly. Some are actually suing each other,
          taking their relatives to court. Mothers are becoming
          estranged from daughters, fathers not talking to sons.
          They all claim to be lovers of Jesus -- yet they're
          still holding onto anger, bitterness, ugliness. It's
          all chaos.

          Since I began pastoring, I've been caught in the middle
          of many family feuds. And I can testify that few of
          these wars are ever resolved outside of supernatural
          intervention. Why? Everybody wants the other person to
          change.

          One party tells me, "Why is he so stubborn? It's awful.
          He needs to change." Then I hear something similar from
          the other party: "How can she be so hard-hearted? She
          knows I'm doing the best I can. Is this what I get for
          being kind to her?"

          It's always the other person's fault, the other one who
          needs to change. That's why I believe no amount of
          counseling will have an impact, until God's people
          resolve something. We all have to make this our
          sincere, daily prayer: "O God -- change me."

          We spend far too much time praying, "God, change my
          circumstances... change my coworkers... change my
          family situation... change the conditions in my
          life..." Yet we seldom pray this most important prayer:
          "Change me, Lord. The real trouble isn't my spouse, my
          sibling, my friend. I'm the one who stands in need of
          prayer."

          God orchestrates the steps and lives of all of his
          children. He doesn't allow anything to happen to us
          merely by happenstance or fate. And that means he has
          allowed your crisis. What is he trying to tell you
          through it? He's saying you need to change.

          Like it or not, we're all in the process of changing,
          in one way or another. In the spiritual realm, there is
          no such thing as mere existence; we're continually
          being changed, either for good or for bad. We're either
          becoming more like our Lord or more like the world, --
          either growing in Christ or backsliding.

          So, are you becoming more sweet-spirited, like Jesus?
          Are you looking soberly in the mirror each day and
          praying, "Lord, I want to conform to your image in
          every area of my life"?

          Or has your bitterness taken root, turning into
          rebellion and hardness of heart? Have you learned to
          shield yourself from the convicting word of God and the
          voice of his Spirit? Are you spewing out things now you
          once thought a Christian would never be capable of
          speaking? Are you hardening beyond change?

          If this describes you, let me tell you plainly: You
          will never receive deliverance unless you change. Your
          life will only become more chaotic, and your situation
          will worsen. Stop building your case, pointing your
          finger, justifying yourself. God won't meet you until
          you wake up and admit, "Nothing is going to change for
          me, unless I'm changed."

          Cry out to the Lord honestly in prayer: "Change me, O
          God. Dig deep in me -- show me where I've failed and
          gone astray. Expose my pride, anger, stubbornness and
          sin. Help me to lay it all down."

          How many more experts, counselors, lonely nights and
          fruitless strivings must you endure before you wake up
          to the truth? If any healing or restoration is going to
          take place, you have to take responsibility. Your
          miracle is dependent on your being changed.

          If you desire to be changed, God's word clearly shows
          two steps you must take. Heed this word, and you will
          experience lasting change:

                      -------------------------------

                          1. There Is a Veil Over
                        Your Eyes, Blinding You --
                          and It Must Be Removed.

                      -------------------------------

          Paul describes one change that must take place before
          any other change is possible:

          "Seeing then that we have such hope, we use great
          plainness of speech: and not as Moses, which put a vail
          over his face, that the children of Israel could not
          stedfastly look to the end of that which is abolished:
          but their minds were blinded: for until this day
          remaineth the same vail untaken away in the reading of
          the old testament; which vail is done away in Christ.
          But even unto this day, when Moses is read, the vail is
          upon their heart.

          "Nevertheless when he shall turn to the Lord, the vail
          shall be taken away. Now the Lord is that Spirit: and
          where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. But
          we all, with open face beholding as in a glass the
          glory of the Lord, are changed into the same image from
          glory to glory, even as by the Spirit of the Lord" (2
          Corinthians 3:12-18).

          In this passage, Paul is talking primarily about the
          blindness of the Jews concerning Jesus as the messiah.
          Yet he is also laying down a principle that applies to
          all people, Jew or Gentile. He's talking about
          blindness to biblical truth. Note verse 14: "But their
          minds were blinded: for until this day remaineth the
          same vail untaken away in the reading of the old
          testament; which vail is done away in Christ."

          Please understand, the people Paul wrote to were
          sincere. They faithfully studied the books of Moses,
          the law and prophets, the Psalms of David. They revered
          God's word, teaching from it and quoting it freely. But
          there was still a veil over their eyes.

          We think of a spiritual veil covering the eyes of Jews,
          Muslims and others, blinding them to the truth about
          Jesus. Yet there is also a veil blinding the eyes of
          many believers. They read God's clear warnings in
          scripture, they hear them preached with power -- yet
          they're still not affected. In fact, they continue
          doing the very things they hear God's word renounce.
          Consider these examples:

             * Jesus himself says, "If ye forgive men their
               trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive
               you: but if ye forgive not men their trespasses,
               neither will your Father forgive your trespasses"
               (Matthew 6:14-15).

          How much clearer can God be on this matter of
          forgiveness? Yet many Christians simply won't let go of
          their bitter, vengeful thoughts. They claim, "Oh, I've
          forgiven that person" -- but their heart isn't in their
          words. And the Lord knows better.

          Perhaps such a Christian has been mistreated or
          despitefully used by someone -- his boss, his spouse, a
          coworker, a friend. Now he thinks he's justified in
          holding onto his anger and unforgiveness. Yet scripture
          says if he allows even an ounce of unforgiveness in his
          heart, his sins will begin piling up against him.

          Think of the horrible danger this Christian is in. Day
          after day his sins are mounting. His prayers aren't
          being heard. He's totally on his own, always in danger,
          his soul open to demonic powers. And when he stands
          before God at the judgment, every one of his sins will
          rise up and accuse him. Not one trespass will have been
          forgiven -- because he wouldn't forgive others.

          He'll hear the Lord say, "I warned you, called to you,
          spoke to you as plainly as I could -- but you wouldn't
          listen. Instead, you held onto your unforgiveness. And
          now, I will not forgive you." That is the end result of
          spiritual blindness.

             * "For the Lord, the God of Israel, saith that he
               hateth putting away [divorce]..." (Malachi 2:16).
               Scripture states very clearly that God hates
               divorce. Yet many Christians today tell their
               pastor or friends, "I've prayed about divorcing my
               spouse, and God has told me it's okay."

          No. God responds to this lie directly in the next
          verse: "Ye have wearied the Lord with your words. Yet
          ye say, Wherein have we wearied him? When ye say, Every
          one that doeth evil is good in the sight of the Lord,
          and he delighteth in them; or, Where is the God of
          judgment?" (verse 17).

          The Lord is saying, in other words: "You go to church,
          praise me and put on a Christian smile. Yet you deal
          treacherously with your spouse -- and you handle my
          word deceitfully. I've told you I hate divorce, yet you
          go through with it. You even call it a good thing,
          saying I approve. But you're blind. You refuse to
          believe that I'm going to judge your disobedience."

          Divorce among Christians today is as high as the rate
          among unbelievers. Tell me -- is God's word nothing but
          a joke? Can his warnings be cast aside as mere
          suggestions rather than commandments? No, never. There
          is a veil over the church's eyes. And God is warning
          us, "All the counseling in the world won't do you any
          good if you don't obey my commands. My word has to
          become the very rule of your life."

          (This is not to cast reproach on anyone who is already
          divorced. Divorce is unavoidable in certain situations,
          such as physical abuse, adultery or abandonment by an
          unbelieving spouse.)

             * "I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them
               that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and
               pray for them which despitefully use you, and
               persecute you" (Matthew 5:44). "A soft answer
               turneth away wrath" (Proverbs 15:1). "Be ye angry,
               and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your
               wrath" (Ephesians 4:26).

          A thousand counselors can tell you you've got a right
          to be angry, to feel resentment, to withhold
          forgiveness. But in the end, their words simply don't
          count. God's word is the final one. And if you don't
          fear it -- if you aren't prepared to obey his commands
          in all -- matters you have no hope of deliverance.

          The Bible speaks loudly and clearly to all who would
          obey the Lord: "You cannot be changed if you remain
          willingly blind to God's word."

                      -------------------------------

                        2. The Veil Can Be Removed
                      Only by "Turning" to the Lord.

                      -------------------------------

          Paul says that before our blindness can be removed, we
          have to turn to the Lord. "Nevertheless when it shall
          turn to the Lord, the veil shall be taken away" (2
          Corinthians 3:16). The Greek word for turn here means
          "to reverse course." In short, Paul is saying, "You
          have to admit that the course you're taking has brought
          you to emptiness, ruin, despair."

          If your life is in some kind of turmoil -- if something
          is terribly wrong, and things are deteriorating -- you
          know you're going to have to change course. You may
          think, "It's my husband who's in a bad place. I'm
          waiting for him to change." Or, "My wife is headed for
          ruin unless she changes." Or, "My boss is all wrong.
          Something has to change in him."

          We see so clearly others mistakes and wrongdoings. Yet
          we're blind to our own need for change. We need a
          reality break -- to admit to God, "It's me, Lord. I'm
          the one who needs to change. Please, father, show me
          where I've gone wrong."

          How can we change course? How can we turn to the Lord
          and have the veil removed? Here is the prescription
          Paul gives us for change:

          1. Change is exclusively the work of the Holy Ghost.
          "How shall not the ministration of the spirit be rather
          glorious?" (2 Corinthians 3:8). We simply can't change
          ourselves. Only the Spirit of God can conform us to the
          glorious image of Christ. We've all heard it said,
          "When a person turns to the Lord, God lifts the veil
          from his eyes." That is solely the Spirit's work.

          We also read, "Now the Lord is that Spirit: and where
          the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty" (verse
          17). The word "liberty" here means "no longer a slave;
          exempt from liability; free, unchained." This describes
          the freedom that comes with having our eyes opened.
          Suddenly, we see things in a new light. Only the Holy
          Spirit can break down our lifelong way of seeing
          things, turn us around and set us on a true course.

          In short, the turning Paul speaks of here means
          trusting fully in God's Spirit. It also means turning
          away from all unbiblical counseling, all ideas and
          plans of your own, and calling on the Holy Ghost alone
          to lead and guide you.

          Paul experienced this kind of turning. In Acts 9, when
          he was still known as Saul, he was on the wrong course.
          Talk about having a veil over his eyes -- he was riding
          to Damascus to persecute the Christians there. Saul
          actually believed he was doing God a favor by arresting
          believers and throwing them in jail.

          But the Lord intercepted this man and created a crisis
          in his life. When Jesus met Saul on the Damascus road,
          he struck him with a light that was so powerful it
          literally blinded him. Saul had to be led sightless to
          a house in Damascus, where he stayed until godly
          Ananias arrived. Ananias told him:

          "...Brother Saul, the Lord, even Jesus, that appeared
          unto thee in the way as thou camest, hath sent me, that
          thou mightest receive thy sight, and be filled with the
          Holy Ghost. And immediately there fell from his eyes as
          it had been scales: and he received sight..." (Acts
          9:17-18).

          Saul surrendered his past, future, everything to the
          Holy Spirit -- and the veil was immediately removed
          from his eyes.

          2. Change also requires what Paul calls an open face.
          He writes, "We all, with open face beholding as in a
          glass the glory of the Lord..." (2 Corinthians 3:18).
          The root word for "open face" here has an amazing
          definition. It means being totally committed to
          allowing God to expose every hidden thing in your heart
          -- for the purpose of being delivered from it all.

          This kind of open face cries out, "Try me, Lord -- see
          if there is any wicked way in me. Show me where I'm
          living contrary to your word. I want to be delivered
          from everything that's unlike you. Away with all my
          pride, my ambitions, my selfish intellect, my
          reasoning. I know I can't think my way out of my
          situation. Holy Spirit, I need your power and wisdom. I
          lay down every hope of solving things my own way."

          For many believers, this is a very difficult thing to
          do. They have survived their whole Christian lives on
          their wits and wisdom. And now to have to admit to
          bungling things up and needing to give up control is
          just too hard.

          The Lord had to strip me of my pride in this area years
          ago. Now, thank the Lord, I freely admit whenever I
          mess things up. My constant prayer is, "God, I do such
          dumb things. I make such awful mistakes, get myself
          into terrible messes. Please, Lord -- clear them all up
          for me. I can't do it. Only you can." Thankfully, God
          delights in fixing our messes when we seek to do his
          will.

          The glass Paul speaks of in this passage means mirror.
          And, beloved, our mirror is God's word. It alone
          accurately reflects back to us our condition. Paul is
          telling us, "Go to the mirror of God's truth, and
          behold your life. Tell the Lord you're on the wrong
          course, and you want to be changed. Ask his Spirit to
          humble you and to open up his word to you. Forsake
          others advice, your own ideas, your own contrivances.
          Instead, turn to the Holy Ghost in full trust. Believe
          what he says to you."

          If you will rely solely on the Holy Spirit, turning
          away from all other helps, he will unveil your eyes.
          He'll also send Holy Ghost led helpers into your life
          -- and you'll begin to change in that very moment.

          3. Paul concludes that we are changed into
          Christ-likeness little by little. This process doesn't
          simply happen overnight. It takes place slowly... step
          by step... as we seek him and obey his word: "We ...are
          changed into the same image from glory to glory, even
          as by the Spirit of the Lord" (2 Corinthians 3:18).

          You may not feel it, but you're changing every time you
          open the scriptures and read his word with an open
          heart, every time you get on your knees and make
          quality time for him, every time you call on the Holy
          Spirit to guide and teach you. You may not think you're
          making any progress -- but you are.

                      -------------------------------

                       Paul Outlines Three Wonderful
                        Evidences of Change Worked
                         in Us by the Holy Spirit.

                      -------------------------------

          The Spirit seeks to bring about these three wonderful
          changes in us:

          1. The first change is a growing knowledge that God is
          going to be merciful to us all the way through our
          trial. "Therefore seeing we have this ministry, as we
          have received mercy, we faint not" (2 Corinthians 4:1).

          Here is the merciful ministry we have received from the
          Holy Spirit: He opens our eyes to the tender mercies of
          Christ toward us. He implants in us an inner knowing
          that the Lord is on our side, that he's for us. And he
          shows us how committed God is to keep us from falling
          -- how compassionate he is toward everything we're
          going through, how touched he is by the feelings of our
          infirmities.

          Right now you may feel abused and unloved. The devil
          would have you believe God has left you to your own
          devices -- that you deserve to suffer, that it's all
          over for you, that there is no hope. Beloved, those are
          lies from hell. God wants more than anything else to
          rid you of your perverted concept of him. He loves you
          tenderly -- and he has already set a time to bestow all
          his mercies on you.

          David cried pitifully as he was overwhelmed by his
          situation: "My heart is smitten, and withered like
          grass; so that I forget to eat my bread... I watch, and
          am as a sparrow alone upon the house top. Mine enemies
          reproach me all the day... I have... mingled my drink
          with weeping... My days are like a shadow that
          declineth... " (Psalm 102:4, 7-9, 11). He groaned, "I'm
          in a terrible condition, physically, mentally and
          spiritually."

          Yet that was the very time God had set to deliver
          David. And the Lord moved in quickly with mercy, help
          and comfort. David testified, "Thou shalt arise, and
          have mercy upon Zion: for the time to favour her, yea,
          the set time, is come" (Psalm 102:13).

          God's set time to deliver David was in his lowest hour
          -- when he was thinking, "I've been reduced to
          nothing." Likewise today, God has set a time to deliver
          and send his favor upon us -- and it usually comes in
          our worst hour of trial. That's the time when we're no
          longer struggling to do things on our own. Instead, we
          admit, "Lord, I can't do it -- it's all a mess. I give
          it all over to you."

          2. The second change that takes place is we're no
          longer plagued by thoughts of giving up: "...as we have
          received mercy, we faint not" (2 Corinthians 4:1).

          God wants us to take our eyes off our circumstances and
          quit focusing on how bad things are. The truth is, our
          troubling circumstances may not end soon. In fact, they
          may get worse. And he knows if we focus on changing our
          situation, we'll only fall deeper into anxiety and
          depression. We'll grow weary and faint, giving up hope.

          Yet as the Lord reveals his mercy to us, our fainting
          spells begin to disappear. Soon we have the growing
          assurance that God is at work in us. And nothing is
          more satisfying to our inner man than knowing, "God has
          his hand on me. I haven't arrived -- but I know I'm
          going in the right direction. I'm moving toward the
          Lord."

          Day by day, you'll become stronger in faith. He will
          plant his peace and rest in you. And you'll be lifted
          so far above your circumstances, nothing will be able
          to drag you down to despair again.

          3. The third change to take place in us is a total
          renunciation of all hidden things and dishonesty. "But
          have renounced the hidden things of dishonesty, not
          walking in craftiness, nor handling the word of God
          deceitfully; but by manifestation of the truth
          commending ourselves to every man's conscience in the
          sight of God" (2 Corinthians 4:2). This means we no
          longer go to scripture to try to justify our sin. We
          don't seek out excuses to do wrong.

          God wants our life to be an open book. Therefore, he
          longs to rid us of all hidden sin -- all dishonesty,
          underhandedness, deception, lying, fraud. That's why
          the Holy Spirit searches out every thing in us that's
          unlike Christ. And if we truly want to change, we'll
          open ourselves up to his dealings.

          You can forget about getting counseling, seeking
          self-help or restoring relationships until you
          experience God's change in each of these areas. Put
          everything on the back-burner until you're ready to
          renounce all your hidden sin.

          When you've submitted to God's word and the
          transforming power of his Spirit, you won't have to
          convince others you've changed. As you walk in his
          truth, the Holy Spirit will commend you to the
          consciences of everyone around you. "...by
          manifestation of the truth commending ourselves to
          every man's conscience in the sight of God."

          The Greek word for "commending" here means "God's
          approval." Paul says, "You won't have to impress
          anybody that you've changed. God will move on their
          conscience, telling them inwardly, This person has my
          blessing and approval. "

          No argument can refute the inner evidence that God's
          Spirit has put in you. In fact, your change will either
          attract others or become a rebuke to them. The aura of
          Christ emanating from you will strike their very
          conscience. And that's when you'll find the power to
          influence others -- through the changes taking place in
          you. You'll find relationships being restored. And
          you'll recover your spiritual authority in your home.

          You'll no longer dwell on the changes that need to take
          place in others. Instead, you'll be so encouraged by
          the changes God is working in you, you'll realize,
          "Lord, I know everything is in your hands. I resign
          myself to your will. Just do in me what has to be
          done."

          Now is the time to totally give over all your
          circumstances into his hands. Forget trying to be
          delivered out of your crisis. Instead, focus on God
          changing you and making you an overcomer. Stay in his
          word. Call diligently on his name. Trust the Holy
          Spirit. And make this the constant cry of your heart:
          "Change me, O God."

          ---
          Used with permission granted by World Challenge, P. O.
          Box 260, Lindale, TX 75771, USA.

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